The Story of the Flowers

I picked a flower near the sidewalk.
Placed it on her hair, with outmost care.
I told her, never listen to all of them.
My pretty dear, reject your fear.

The next day, I picked another flower.
Pinned it in her chest, where it looks best.
I told her, be brave my angel.
You may fall down, but don't ever frown.

I stringed some flowers.
A pretty necklace, giving her such grace.
I told her, you are my precious.
Head up high, not letting out a sigh.

And one day, I picked a flower.
Placed it on grave, the last one I gave.
You are now in heaven, my love.
I promise you I'll try, I won't ever cry.

(September 24, 2013)

Let Go

if the amount of time

is the sole basis of value

then you must've meant nothing to me

your absence left a gaping hole

it's like a piece of me was missing

you were just gone so suddenly

i never knew your true value

but everything was clear

by the time i knew i was missing you

i know that we'll be going separate ways

i dont know how i could ever retrieve

all of the memories i had with you

i  hope you'll be happier somewhere else

and you'll be taken care of

since i was stupid and i neglected you

Post Concert Insights

How I miss my friends. It's sad that most of my day remains a big blur because of an incident. Nonetheless, it was a beautiful day.

I miss everything on that day. One of the most unforgettable moments of my existence. I just wished he felt the same way.

Pandora

All the times I spent:
trying to box out all my feelings,
duct tape my loneliness,
and throw in all the memories-
they were all wasted.

My heart was like Pandora's box-
for all of a sudden the lid,
that fucking mighty tight lid,
flew away and exposed the insides.

Even if you destroyed it,
the box- it's all yours.
No matter how much you break and shatter,
it'll find a way to come back.

How hard it is to cause such sorrow:
too much crying and drama.
If only love was the source,
but it was merely curiosity
.

Dream Diary Entry #1

I just had to record this, this dream is bizzare but I like it.

I was in a magical place, I was the only human in there for I have a mission of picking up some animals who plan on running away from home, and plan to live in my dimension- which is just plain old earth. it was a notorious escape with chase scenes but of course, we made it. Anyway, the portal could not be closed immediately since it needs a cool down from using too much energy so someone was able to get past it. We found a house with no inhabitants, only to find out that the people in it were just about to go home from vacation. Once they arrived, they pretended to be stuffed animals and I pretended to be a doll. The kids played with us and such. I locked myself in the bathroom and I heard a knock from a housekeeper, and she said she developed a serum that would turn them into humans so the owner just welcomed them for a party. 

Once I walked out, they were all enjoying the sunset in the balcony. Everyone was with a partner of some sort. I was talking to this guy and was laughing and just having fun, when suddenly, lxs came along. I highfived him, he took my hand and placed his arm around my shoulder. Then we watched the sunset together, and he leaned in for a kiss. Then after a short time, he told me we could not be together. I was pain stricken, of course. Then my animal-turned-human friends told me that they wish to go back home. I escorted them back to that magical dimension, and once I came back, it was all different. Like I returned to my normal life.

So I was supposed to go to a debut or a soiree in a hotel. The people were oddly familiar, like they were my animal friends. Then, lxs came along and was my date. He hugged me, took my hand and kissed me sometimes. Then, he slipped that we will somehow break up anyway tomorrow.

Guess he was destined to leave me right away. Even in multiple dimensions such as in my dream and that magical dimension. 

I don't know

people come and go

I will never ever understand how people manage to just walk into your life then leave all of a sudden. And as I quote Pudge (from Looking For Alaska), "You can’t just make me different and then leave. You can’t. You can’t change me and make my whole life centered around you, then leave." But you just did. I'm so confused at everything. I thought you were completely different from them. But you're so fucking worse. You made me your one-week-affair then pretended nothing happened. I actually thought that finally, I'm going to smile because of love again. But no, I got stood up. Love is a lie. Everything is a lie. 

I used to lie hanging at the edge of my seat, ecstatic of what might happen next. But now, I'm shrouded with fear. 

Electric

From a distance, I just admired you-
Hoping you felt the same way too.
Somehow, fate got in the way.
Magical, brightening our day.

You seemed to came out from a book,
amazing how perfect the gods cook.
Creating perfect beings, my own dear.
Missing you is now truly my greatest fear.

You really erased my past-
with that smile, the spell was cast.
How happy I am that you are near.
I would do everything to keep you here.

Sparks suddenly came out flying,
with no need of us trying.
Maybe this means we are meant to be-
because right now, you're all I can see.